Posted in poems, Uncategorized

Two Places At Once


Two Places At Once


I wish I could do that

Be in two places, at the same time

Be in one place, doing my own thing

Be at another place, causing destruction

to the people I loath

And I don’t even know it



Cuz that’s what my enemy is doing,

Causing me to self-destruct

Knowing they’re somewhere else

Yet, they’re able to cause destruction

Without even being here



I wish I could do that

Be in two places at the same time

Leaving a person in misery

Over feelings that haven’t been shed,

caused by me, staying in the person’s memory,

Leaving them embittered and small



While I do nothing but sit inside myself

Living and that is all.



I wish I could do that

I wish I could be in two places

at the same time



Yeah, I wish I could do that.



They would love seeing you this way.

Keep saying that wise one,

You’re right, yes my enemy would.



But like nothing lasts forever,

My enemy’s power won’t either.

And that is all.




Continue reading “Two Places At Once”

Posted in announcements, first chapter, our stories, poems, realization, Uncategorized

❝the time when I put on my father’s glasses…” by Meia Reid


Everyone has one, right? Even if you’ve never met him in your life, it didn’t take one person to make you.

Let me begin…

Continue reading “❝the time when I put on my father’s glasses…” by Meia Reid”

Posted in poems, realization

Even if I Get Better… Things Won’t.

I’ve realized that no matter what, that no matter if I’m bettering myself, everything around me remains the same.

It’s good when things are the same, but when everyone around you has been in some sort of funk following the patterns in which they only know how to cope, it gets frustrating and very overwhelming.

Just because I’m getting better, doesn’t mean things around me are.
There’s days where I think there’s no use in getting up from bed. I’ll be treated the same, I’ll do the same things that I do everyday, and nothing will change.
I wish I could float away…

Posted in poems, realization, Uncategorized

Body Dysmorphic Disorder

Body Dysmorphic Disorder – A mental illness involving obsessive focus on a perceived flaw in appearance.

BDD (Body Dysmorphic Disorder) is rarely talked about.

What happened to me, was I had been messing with my teeth and scrutinizing myself in the mirror, and the next thing you know my jaw hurts. And, since my jaw hurt I thought i had made my face asymmetrical. Messed my face up.

My jaws looked uneven.

it was intense.

It’s like all the confidence I had for my face went out the window when I saw that my face was asymmetrical, I thought I was ugly. It was like basic training for me, it was like the BDD was tearing me down but at the same I had to build myself back up.

It was like YOU or ME amplified. Like every time I looked in the mirror, BDD was staring back at me and saying, “You are either gonna let ME ruin your life, or YOU are going to overcome this bump in your life.”

I had to make a decision.

It was like I was Narcissus (and I would stare at my face for hours) and I still wouldn’t be happy about my face. The breaking point I would compare to is when Narcissus had fallen into the water. I felt as if I I’d fallen into a dark ocean of water and was drowning… but when I went to therapy, got pills, and accepted my face for what it was. I saw that my face hadn’t always been perfect before this. That it’d always been a little asymmetrical. But that not everyone is perfect. Not even models or celebrities.


I’m starting to see myself as beautiful again. Slowly but surely.

I’d dealt with it for 3-4 months. It wasn’t long. But boy, it felt long.

Yeah it’s a process, and I might not look at myself the same as I had before. But that’s not a bad thing. I’ve learned from it. And I can say I have more confidence about myself than I did before.

Ironic enough.

Besides it’s not about how you saw yourself before, it’s about how it’s transformed you and made you a better person now than you were before whatever bad thing had come into your life.

I don’t know, but I have feeling that when I see my as beautiful again. That I won’t feel 100% beautiful but 115% beautiful (inside and out). Counting from the stuff I’ve learned along this journey and things have accomplished and better’d myself at.

Posted in our stories, poems, realization, Uncategorized

❝The Prison Cell❞

❝Sometimes it seems like we’re all living in some kind of prison. And the crime is how much we hate ourselves. It’s good to get really dressed up once in a while. And admit the truth: that when you really look closely? People are so strange and so complicated that they’re actually… beautiful. Possibly even me.❞

– Angela (My So-Called Life)

❝The Prison Cell❞

There’s this girl who’s locked inside this prison cell with only a shattered glass mirror to keep her company. And she decides that she brought everything onto herself.

The prison. The broken mirror. The torture.

Continue reading “❝The Prison Cell❞”